Not Every Space Is Yours

I had just become accustomed to the cold that Chicago winters brought. Moving here in January of 2018 and all. Growing up in the warm climate that Los Angeles brings forces you into constant comfort. It was new, but it was necessary.

I decided to make an effort in Chicago despite very real hesitations from what I had observed being a graduate student at Moody Theological Seminary. I bundled up in my black coat, snow boots, and black beanie with a pom-pom ball atop it. I walked across the parking lot to attend a panel discussion I read about on one of the flyers hung around campus. I hoped to attend more events for Black History Month at Moody Bible Institute, but being a graduate student, along with the exhaustion that comes with being Black and woman and introverted in white spaces, forced me to choose wisely. As I made my way up the stairs to the panel, just a few minutes late, I sat and observed. It was odd to me that a White woman was seated on a panel during Black History Month. Even if she had been a missionary in an African country for 10 years or so.

Nonetheless, I listened to what she had to say. Then one of the final questions came up: Have you seen how colonization in America has also impacted colonization in Africa? I’m paraphrasing, of course. Before the other Black panelists could answer a question that was in its nature straightforward, she puts her microphone up to her mouth and said,

“I saw that question in the email and didn’t understand it, and I’m sure that the other panelists were confused by it too.”

I sat there as other students mumbled and under my breath said, “That question isn’t for you.”

Of the Black panelists, the Black woman spoke up and said,

“I saw that question in the email, too, and I understood it quite well.”

We won’t go into how missionaries started going to Africa to spread the gospel because their true motive was to whiten it up. That’s my phrase for it. Because let’s be honest: White people have quite some work to do on themselves and within society before I, myself, hand out the ally card. We’re too quick to claim the bare minimum as “woke.”

But, this correction by the Black woman was the start of showing that not every space is for everyone. The fact of the matter is that we can engage with other cultures and appreciate the beauty that those cultures bring, but there is a time for you to stand back and recognize that this space is not for you. This question is not for you. And that goes beyond understanding the question. This White woman was and continues to be in no way affected by colonization on any continent. Because years of slave trade and colonization have made her the standard. Why insert her into a panel during Black History Month? I don’t know.

It could be her mission work. It could be her standing at the school. It could be because Moody does not understand the necessity of Black students having their own safe space and every student of color within it’s brick walls.

What I do know is that there is so much power in Black women sharing their voices and perspectives. There is so much power in Black women and Black men coming together to correct and clarify. Though, it is not on us alone.

This simple action gives space for so many others to recognize the power and beauty of their voices and perspectives. To help us see that there are spaces that belong to us where we are allowed to invite others in, but we are allowed to create it alone. And, for that, we owe no explanation or silence to anyone.

Writer Bio:

Shonette Reed is the founder and editor of Resolute Magazine. The South Central Los Angeles native enjoys cooking, exploring, expansive conversations, and reading a good book when she's not working or planning for work.


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